Coffee shop creepster

Tonight I went to my usual spot to get coffee, work on my book and finish other various writing assignments. I sat down facing the door with my usual order (large mocha, no whipped cream) and set to work on my macbook.

I like sitting facing the door no matter where I go, just because its this freaky control issue. I like to know who's in my surroundings, and tonight that natural intuition and obsessive OCD trait paid off.

I was a couple pages in to my work when I see this 6'3", dark haired, lanky guy in khakis belted at his waist and a blue button-up shirt walk inside. The way he walked, sort of this Forrest Gump-ish hunch, just radiated gawky. If you've ever seen the movie Superbad, he was the epitome of "McLovin'." (see photo)

He was socially awkward at its finest.

He sat down directly in my line of vision in one of the large armchairs by the front window. I peered up over my laptop screen, and he sort of raised one bony pale hand up and half smiled at me. It may seem sort of bitchy of me to not even give the poor guy a smile, but there are a few reasons why I did not:

a.) I'm a writer. I'm not friendly.
b.) I really, really didn't want him to come talk to me. How would that benefit me? There is a 50% chance he's a totally lovely fellow. There is also a 50% chance he's a total creep. I happen to be pessimistic in those types of situations.
c.) I had a bad feeling about him.

So a few minutes later, he gets up and gets a cup of coffee. Conveniently, I happen to be sitting right behind the bar where the newspapers are.

Fan-freaking-tastic.

He is leafing through the paper, and even though my back was to him, I got that weird feeling that he was looking at me. Know what I'm talking about? I was also concerned he was looking at my laptop, so I made sure I kept any of my facebook, twitter, etc. off the screen so he didn't see any personal info. (I know, a little extreme... but seriously you never know.)

Finally Forrest Gawkward sits down at the table directly behind me and starts reading his newspaper. It was almost 9 and I planned to stay until 9:15 (I had plans at 9:30) but by this time my creative juices had been replaced with creep juice so I had to cut my writing short.

I get up and walk out, when he gets up really quickly leaving his newspaper on the table and tries to (awkwardly, of course) hold the door open for me even though he is a.) behind me and b.) I'm already nearly out the door.

By this time I'm wishing I had asked for a taser for Christmas, and I start frantically calling/texting anyone who would answer. I walk towards my car and he is just steps behind me, so I re-think that plan of action and just decide to stand in front of the coffee shop. Creepster McLovin' notices my suspicions and then starts practically running in the opposite direction.

Thankfully I knew one of the regulars who then walked me out to the faithful Cruiser.

Maybe I'm being totally paranoid, but, cliche as it is, its better to be safe than sorry.